Reflection on "The Soul of the Helper"

Dr. Holly Oxhandler, author of The Soul of the Helper: Seven States to Seeing the Sacred Within Yourself So You Can See It In Others was the second speaker in our Psychotherapy Webinar Series.  Her topic was “The Soul of the Helper: Contemplating and Integrating the Intersection between spirituality and mental health.”  

Dr. Oxhandler has researched burnout in caregivers as well as how to prevent it or recover from it.  Out of her research, she has developed a program she calls Namaste Theory.  She reminds us that this Hindu greeting means “The Divine in me recognizes and greets the Divine in you. The Light in me sees the Light in you.  The Sacred in me sees the Sacred in you.”

Her thesis is that to prevent burnout, helpers need to be curiously attentive and open to our dynamic inner landscape as we engage in serving others. This includes our spiritual and mental health journeys. We do this so that we can care for others from a place of sacred groundedness. Unless we have recognized and healed what’s hurting within ourselves, we will not see clearly the hurt and brokenness in people around us. This will limit our ability to respond in ways that are genuinely helpful.  (paraphrased from the book)

As the months of the pandemic have lengthened into years, the rate of burnout among psychotherapists is higher than ever.  More people are reaching out for mental health support.  Those we see are experiencing greater stress. There is also more existential confusion, fear, and despair.  We have had to adapt the ways we practice due to the health risks of being with people physically. Many of the ways we used to replenish our own internal resources have been unavailable or drastically changed as they have moved to virtual gatherings and offerings. 

Dr. Oxhandler’s reminder that the only way to be healthy and have a sustainable practice is to attend to our own inner resources is timely.  These days more than ever we do well to stay connected to our higher power.  We need to experience the Light, Love, and Wisdom that lives in us and experience the benefits of that connection. This makes it possible for us to recognize that resource within our clients and support them as they connect with it as well.

When we are in a spiritually grounded place there is an interesting loop that can occur.  We experience the divine in us. We see the divine in our clients.  As we see the divine in them, we learn even more about the divine and how it works and manifests.  We then see even more of that in ourselves.